pulse: making progress with the song

2026-05-12 09:43:10 +09:00
parent 637c4d8ae3
commit 07f985c393
1 changed files with 5 additions and 3 deletions
@@ -74,13 +74,15 @@ Ocean as a desert buries all of its life
 Deck the shell with a perfect thermocline
 // 'deck the shell': intentional vagueness between 'decorate the outer shell' and 'knock on the border surface'.  

-Dimmed light gone from the rover's eyes
-Or the next one could never fire otherwise
+Gone is the spark in your rover's eyes
+Or there is no space for another one otherwise
 // The image is good, the language isn't: too plain here. 
 // Stay optical
+// *New line 1*:
+// Curtain shut before the Fresnel bights

 // ending verse(s) before the painfully long instrumental outro
-partial coldfront over a landlocked island
+particular pressure over a landlocked island
 unravelled is the illusionary ziptie independency
 lamenting functions weave a zigzag pattern
 stabilising fins break the rogue waves