diff --git a/wip/pulse.md b/wip/pulse.md index 9d89bab..ddcbe7a 100644 --- a/wip/pulse.md +++ b/wip/pulse.md @@ -74,13 +74,15 @@ Ocean as a desert buries all of its life Deck the shell with a perfect thermocline // 'deck the shell': intentional vagueness between 'decorate the outer shell' and 'knock on the border surface'. -Dimmed light gone from the rover's eyes -Or the next one could never fire otherwise +Gone is the spark in your rover's eyes +Or there is no space for another one otherwise // The image is good, the language isn't: too plain here. // Stay optical +// *New line 1*: +// Curtain shut before the Fresnel bights // ending verse(s) before the painfully long instrumental outro -partial coldfront over a landlocked island +particular pressure over a landlocked island unravelled is the illusionary ziptie independency lamenting functions weave a zigzag pattern stabilising fins break the rogue waves